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Thinking Unwanted Thoughts |
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INTRODUCTION
There might be all kinds of reasons why the mental body would prefer not to have too much contact with other intraselfular parts. If it closes itself off from the emotional information less or hardly any pain is felt, no contact with intuition implies no 'interference' from other sources than the 'waking consciousness', just like the plug in the communication pipe line with the physical body doesn't require one to listen to any hardship from that source. Closing your ears for the sounds of your ancestors or your soul group makes it even easier to do what your solitary mind likes to do. Sometimes, however, even the solitary mind may get overwhelmed by a surge of information from other parts of the inner constellation. This page is about the difficult situation in which the mental body notices unwanted unethical thoughts in its system, but it is also aware that it has trouble dealing with them.
THINKING UNWANTED THOUGHTS
Imagine the situation in which someone who is trying to ascend his body notices all kinds of thoughts that he would prefer not to think. Thoughts that are not becoming for an ascending initiate. How to deal with such a situation? Thoughts that are rather unfamiliar to yourself? Even though you don't want to think certain thoughts, they appear nevertheless. They are like invisible mosquitos buzzing around your head.
If the solitary mind or intellect would really run the show, he would be able to deal with it properly: he would be the master of the show and he could decide which thoughts to have in the system and which are to be dispelled. Apparently this is not the case. I think that even with people having hardly any contact with their other intraselfular parts like their emotional/intuitive/dreamtime/physical bodies or group-soul can still notice thoughts that they are not too happy with. Perhaps you are able to block them out for a while (or project them onto others), but eventually the thoughts are bound to overwhelm the intellect and cause associated 'irrational' and 'illogical' behavior.
MEETING SOME BODY BUDDIES
The last couple of weeks I have been actively focusing nearly all of my 'ascending' attention to the opening up of the communication lines between my various bodies. I have tried to intend the shift from a mostly solitary mental body towards an aligned mental body who is capable of tuning into the various bodies, only through intent, without the need of any external tools like a pendulum. I like to think that my process so far has already caused a relevant change in this 'solitary-to-aligned' shift.
One of the most interesting experiences was my renewed contact with my dreamtime self. Before going to bed I asked to feel the consciousness of my dreamtime body and to my surprise it really happened that night. It was like meeting an old friend, who was more like myself than I had thought. I recognized the playfulness, the joy and ease the dreamtime body feels because it is not restricted to the laws of gravity as my physical body is. I also recognized the slight lack of interest in the rest of its intraselfular parts. It seemed as if fun was quite important indeed.
When I decided to shift my attention from the dreamtime body to my physical body for a couple of days I received a rather weird dream in which I was in my house, together with my daughter. First we went to the cellar which was about to collapse, then we went to the attic which was quite chaotic: all kinds of animals were running around: pigs, mice, birds and others. Even though it looked rather chaotic it had some beauty in it: the pig family were having quite a good time up there and they were not too bothered my the other animals running all around them.
When I woke up after this dream I felt that I needed to make a change: although the animals were rather friendly, I didn't want them in my attic: I intended to clean up the place. I also intended to stabilize my cellar. I asked to be shown the reasons for this situation and perhaps the associated thought forms which might need to be transformed.
FEELING LIKE A ONE-EYED MAN
This reminds me of a feeling that I have often felt during my ascension quest. My mental body has been uttering (or repeating after Mila) all kinds of intentions that would trigger the necessary processes and defense mechanisms. I still think it is rather awkward that my partly aligned mental body would be the one to command other parts of my self to change certain things in their field. With a communication line that is at present rather brittle, to say the least, how could it intend any changes in the physical body? I'm not even sure if my liver is on my right hand side or the left hand side of my body, so to speak.
It is such a sad situation: all this fragmented communication, whereas the original blueprint probably was one in which the aligned mental body would instantly realize what was the cause of a certain ache in the physical, or some new feeling or intuition. The mental body would notice a new set of thought forms and it would be able to quickly determine where these thought forms would originate from. Having this awareness would give the mental body all the required information to make a balanced intention to alter anything in the desired direction. I would like to contribute to the return of this mode of being.
A GENETIC RELEASE
At the moment I guess that I am experiencing the release of genetically stored thought forms. This is the only explanation I can find right now for the appearance of certain unwanted thought forms. It is interesting to see how one can respond to these thought forms. I could have thought that I have turned sour myself: I am evil and bad to the core. I could have tried to deny these lines of thinking, closing down all connections between me and my 'body buddies' or I could try to open up to these thought forms even more, in order to feel them, in order to explore and re-experience them. This of course with the final goal of understanding and transmuting them.
For me it is valuable to tune into these thought forms to see how certain Anu or Anu Slave people must have acted or felt in the past. It also gives me a perspective on the shame many people must have felt for noticing certain thoughts. It even allows me to forgive all those who were simply overwhelmed by the stored karmic power of certain thought forms, leading to a repeat of certain undesirable behavior. It is sad to realize how many people have been condemned for something they hardly had any control of. People who are to a certain degree the 'victim' of the highly distorted state of our genetics.
CONCLUSION
Opening up to the various parts within might lead to the eruption of certain thought forms that one may label as unwanted. instead of trying to seal those thoughts off, I think it would be more constructive to feel sympathy for all those who have been overwhelmed with those thoughts, even when their rational mind would abhor them. Perhaps we can relate it to energetic power plays that our ancestors have committed in the past, or perhaps we can connect it to the way we have been 'victims' as a result of the playing out of certain thought forms. For now I think it is best to treat these unwanted thought forms with a sense of curiosity without identifying with them.
These unwanted thought forms are great material that I can use to pose question to my various buddies. Perhaps I am able to hear from them what they have to say about the causes of these unwanted thought forms. Wouldn't it be nice if I were able to treat these buzzing invisible mosquitos with a sense of empathy? Perhaps these mosquitos only are annoying because everyone treats them without any compassion? Perhaps they will lose their need to sting us if we were to realize what they are trying to tell us? It is not easy to love an unwanted buzzing mosquito thought form, though.
Gibbon
April 2007
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